2349 words, 12 minute read.
Thinking about what emotions or attitudes ought to characterise a Christian, the following may well show up in top-ten lists: self-giving, generous, caring, compassionate, humble, faithful, peace-loving, merciful, just, patient, gentle, bold, persistent, forgiving and joyful. However, an emotion that would not make it into such lists appears repeatedly in the Gospels, namely fear. Fear fills the hearts of the chief priests and the scribes when they see the crowds cheering Jesus’ entrance into Jerusalem before his passion (cf. Luke 22:2, Matthew 21:46, Mark 12:12), it grips Pilate when the chief priests invoke the law to force Jesus’ execution (cf. John 19:8), it pervades even the battle-hardened centurion and his men who were guarding Jesus on the cross (cf. Matthew 27:54), it makes the guards who watch Jesus’ tomb become “like dead men” when the angel appears and rolls away the stone blocking its entrance (cf. Matthew 28:4), it fills the townspeople who see Jesus curing a possessed man and sending his demons into a herd of swine (cf. Mark 5:33, Luke 8:35) or bringing a dead young man back to life (cf. Luke 7:16), it strikes the shepherds to whom an angel announces the birth of Jesus (cf. Luke 2:9).
In all these instances it can easily and rightly be argued though that fear is an emotion associated with those who oppose Jesus or who are, at least, far from him.
More interesting is the case of Jesus’ earthly father, Joseph, whom an angel admonishes in a dream: “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary your wife into your home. For it is through the holy Spirit that this child has been conceived in her. She will bear a son and you are to name him Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” (Matthew 1:20-21). Joseph’s fears subside and he refrains from divorcing Mary, who bears another’s child. Fear enters Joseph’s life again when he follows an angel’s instructions to take Mary and Jesus back to Israel (Matthew 2:20) after living as refugees in Egypt, also on the angel’s instructions. Here Joseph followed what the angel tells him, “[b]ut when he heard that Archelaus was ruling over Judea in place of his father Herod, he was afraid to go back there. And because he had been warned in a dream, he departed for the region of Galilee.” (Matthew 2:22) Joseph’s fear here is part of discerning God’s will and contributes to keeping his family safe.
Fear is also very much present in the minds of Jesus’ closest followers, the apostles, and I think it is good both to note this and to see how Jesus responds to it.
To begin with, fear enters the apostles’ life from their very first encounter with Jesus. St. Luke recounts that event for Peter, James and John as follows:
“He saw two boats there alongside the lake; the fishermen had disembarked and were washing their nets. Getting into one of the boats, the one belonging to Simon, he asked him to put out a short distance from the shore. Then he sat down and taught the crowds from the boat. After he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Put out into deep water and lower your nets for a catch.” Simon said in reply, “Master, we have worked hard all night and have caught nothing, but at your command I will lower the nets.” When they had done this, they caught a great number of fish and their nets were tearing. They signaled to their partners in the other boat to come to help them. They came and filled both boats so that they were in danger of sinking. When Simon Peter saw this, he fell at the knees of Jesus and said, “Depart from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man.” For astonishment at the catch of fish they had made seized him and all those with him, and likewise James and John, the sons of Zebedee, who were partners of Simon. Jesus said to Simon, “Do not be afraid; from now on you will be catching men.” When they brought their boats to the shore, they left everything and followed him.” (Luke 5:2-11)
Fear here is quite a natural reaction when faced with the miraculous actions of Jesus and one for which he does not castigate or admonish them – he simply reassures them that fear is not necessary, without reprimanding them for it.
Jesus is very patient with the apostles though and even on the next occasion, when they are afraid – St. Matthew even says that they are “terrified” – that the boat they and the sleeping Jesus are in is going to capsize, his response is rather mild:
“He got into a boat and his disciples followed him. Suddenly a violent storm came up on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by waves; but he was asleep. They came and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We are perishing!” He said to them, “Why are you terrified, O you of little faith?” Then he got up, rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was great calm. The men were amazed and said, “What sort of man is this, whom even the winds and the sea obey?” (Matthew 8:23-27; cf. Mark 4:36-41)
And still the apostles cannot get used to Jesus’ actions and it is terror that fills them again when they see him walking on water (the same man they saw stop a storm!). Jesus again just reassures them, draws their attention to himself, whom they know, and does not make a big deal out of it:
“When it was evening, the boat was far out on the sea and he was alone on shore. Then he saw that they were tossed about while rowing, for the wind was against them. About the fourth watch of the night, he came toward them walking on the sea. He meant to pass by them. But when they saw him walking on the sea, they thought it was a ghost and cried out. They had all seen him and were terrified. But at once he spoke with them, “Take courage, it is I, do not be afraid!” He got into the boat with them and the wind died down. They were [completely] astounded.” (Mark 6:47-51, cf. Matthew 14:26-27; Cf. John 6:19-20)
Fear returns again when the apostles (the same three who were scared when they first met him) see Jesus transfigured and joined by Moses and Elijah. Here Jesus not only, but again simply, gently, invites them not to be afraid, but he touches them, since part of their fear in this case must stem from their doubting his reality and the sense of touch both dispels that fear and is a sign of warmth and affection:
“After six days Jesus took Peter, James, and John his brother, and led them up a high mountain by themselves. And he was transfigured before them; his face shone like the sun and his clothes became white as light. And behold, Moses and Elijah appeared to them, conversing with him. Then Peter said to Jesus in reply, “Lord, it is good that we are here. If you wish, I will make three tents here, one for you, one for Moses, and one for Elijah.” While he was still speaking, behold, a bright cloud cast a shadow over them, then from the cloud came a voice that said, “This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased; listen to him.” When the disciples heard this, they fell prostrate and were very much afraid. But Jesus came and touched them, saying, “Rise, and do not be afraid.”” (Matthew 17:1-7; Cf. Mark 9:2-6)
Not only his deeds, but his words too make the apostles afraid, as in the following passage where Jesus tells them about his impending suffering and death:
“He was teaching his disciples and telling them, “The Son of Man is to be handed over to men and they will kill him, and three days after his death he will rise.” But they did not understand the saying, and they were afraid to question him.” (Mark 9:31-32; Luke 9:43-45)
Finally, even after his death and resurrection, Jesus’ presence engendered fear among his followers, as can be seen from St. Luke’s account of two disciples meeting him on the road to Emmaus and then telling the apostles about it, only to have Jesus himself appear among them:
“So they set out at once and returned to Jerusalem where they found gathered together the eleven and those with them who were saying, “The Lord has truly been raised and has appeared to Simon!” Then the two recounted what had taken place on the way and how he was made known to them in the breaking of the bread. The Appearance to the Disciples in Jerusalem. While they were still speaking about this, he stood in their midst and said to them, “Peace be with you.” But they were startled and terrified and thought that they were seeing a ghost.” (Luke 24:33-37)
Clearly Jesus does not want his followers to be afraid, as he also emphasises during the Last Supper where he says: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid.” (John 14:27) At the same time, fear in the face of the unknown is something that the apostles kept experiencing in spite of – and sometimes because of! – Jesus’ own presence among them, which Jesus in turn had a lot of understanding for and patience with and which he helped them out of with gentleness and closeness.
Fear was also not absent from Jesus’ own mind, e.g., when he feared for the wellbeing of his followers: “Jesus summoned his disciples and said, “My heart is moved with pity for the crowd, for they have been with me now for three days and have nothing to eat. I do not want to send them away hungry, for fear they may collapse on the way.”” (Matthew 15:32). And while he broadly reassured his followers that fear was not necessary even in the face of persecution, Jesus did warn against the Devil and tell his disciples that he is to be feared:
“Therefore do not be afraid of them [who persecute you]. Nothing is concealed that will not be revealed, nor secret that will not be known. What I say to you in the darkness, speak in the light; what you hear whispered, proclaim on the housetops. And do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul; rather, be afraid of the one who can destroy both soul and body in Gehenna. Are not two sparrows sold for a small coin? Yet not one of them falls to the ground without your Father’s knowledge. Even all the hairs of your head are counted. So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” (Matthew 10:26-31, Cf. Luke 12:4-7)
My favorite Gospel passage though, in which Jesus’ followers are shown to be afraid, is that of Mary Magdalene and “the other Mary” going to see Jesus’ tomb on Easter morning:
“After the sabbath, as the first day of the week was dawning, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary came to see the tomb. And behold, there was a great earthquake; for an angel of the Lord descended from heaven, approached, rolled back the stone, and sat upon it. His appearance was like lightning and his clothing was white as snow. The guards were shaken with fear of him and became like dead men. Then the angel said to the women in reply, “Do not be afraid! I know that you are seeking Jesus the crucified. He is not here, for he has been raised just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples, ‘He has been raised from the dead, and he is going before you to Galilee; there you will see him.’ Behold, I have told you.” Then they went away quickly from the tomb, fearful yet overjoyed, and ran to announce this to his disciples. And behold, Jesus met them on their way and greeted them. They approached, embraced his feet, and did him homage. Then Jesus said to them, “Do not be afraid. Go tell my brothers to go to Galilee, and there they will see me.”” (Matthew 28:1-10; Cf. Mark 16:1-8)
A couple of significant things happen here: first, that it is not fear versus no fear that distinguishes the two Marys from the guards – they were all afraid in the face of an unknown and inexplicable event. However, the guards had nothing to soften the blow and were terrified into unconsciousness. The Marys, instead had their relationship with Jesus, which did not cancel out fear, but supplemented it with joy: “fearful yet overjoyed” may just be what a Christian response to the unknown and daunting ought to look like. The fear is real, but so is the knowledge of Jesus’ saving love. Second, the basis for their joy is confirmed by Jesus later meeting them, greeting them and allowing them to come close to him, to embrace him.
I invariably feel a sense of unease when someone is told off or criticised for being afraid or for being unhappy with an unpleasant situation (or when a person in such situations self-criticises or self-censors), because “fear is not of God” or because we have to “accept God’s will” when things go against us. And my unease here is not born of disagreement with either of those statements, but of the, to my mind, unwarranted suppression or denial of the validity of fear or displeasure. Jesus brought the Good News of God’s universal love to a world where fear and unhappiness persist, but where they can be lived with the help of a simultaneous joy born of Jesus’ love for us and closeness to us.
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